elysa (moowazz) wrote in elysiuminfernos,

Empathic Overachiever Insomniac ~ EOI

I see my hands sitting here
and yet they dissappear

Engrossed in energy
some mine own
much belonging to others

Lost in the ideas and words that surround
meaning to do well
meaning to accomplish more
meaning to be worthwhile in this universe

Intentions to keep
distracted for a minute
only it's actually much more
distraction leads to gaps in time
that seem to just never have been

for family
for friends
for those more and less "fortunate"

but who's to say what is or is not fortunate?!?!?!

no, no my friend
we are all fortunate in our own little worlds.
just as we are all unfortunate
it all depends on our own little reality

Then there is the final love
that other one
the one that is supposed to complete you
or at least compliment you greatly
I often wonder if it exists for me


I wonder if I will be open enough to let it in
I push people away
I close off a few deep recesses of my heart

"strong" they say I am
"beautiful" they say I am
"intelligent" they say I am

no, no my friends
they say this for they know not those recesses

these men who wish me for only what they see
they enjoy that I don't share
they enjoy that I am self sufficient

but for this reason they will not win my heart

the one who pries into those secret caverns
the one who pries and stays
the one who stays and still accepts
he will I accept.

until then I shall enjoy the many wonders of the world
until then I shall rejoice in the beauty and wonder of those whose lives I am lucky enough to share
earth nature
human nature
blood family
chosen family
all that exists in this universe the the paradoxes that lie within.

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